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Rome

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When in Rome, do as the Romans do. We decided to pick- pocket all the tourists.
No, not really. We had been warned that professional pickpockets would be waiting in droves at any and all major tourist attractions. I found this to be totally untrue. I did once experience a couple of hands in my pants pockets, but after a few well-placed blows to the head, followed by a flying scissor-kick, my wife backed off my wallet.
Have you ever seen one of those spy movies set in Rome in which drivers chase each other at high speeds, barely missing each other, buildings and pedestrians? Well, that is the way they drive all the time. As none of the vehicles have dents in this mass demo-derby, I can only conclude that these are the best drivers in the world. I would never think of driving there. Definitely a “white knuckle” experience.

My wife, Carrie, a seasoned travel agent, booked us a tour guide for a visit to Vatican City, the papal enclave within Rome. We could have gone on this alone (with no idea what we were looking at), or with a group (with no idea what they were looking at) or a private tour guide, which we totally enjoyed. We met him at the back of Vatican City. He knew all the guards and other group tour guides by first name, and the grounds and contents top to bottom, all explained on his tour. At opening time, WE were the first to be let in, and he immediately led us to the Sistine Chapel, which is the best-known chapel in the Apostolic Palace, the official residence of the Pope in Vatican City.

The entire ceiling is covered in frescos by Michelangelo Buonarroti and other famous artists of that period. We were in there for about 20 minutes; the first 15 minutes we were by ourselves. After a tour of the museums and grounds, we came back that way, and the chapel by then was elbow-to-elbow with tourists and no longer silent. Looking back, how smart it was for my wife to hire the private guide. That was an experience of a lifetime.
Inside St. Peter’s Basilica I overheard a tourist say, “I have
been inside a lot of churches, but this here is probably the biggest.” I thought, no kidding, you could fly an airplane inside of it without hitting anything.

One of my favorite dining experiences in Rome had to have been the small “hole in the wall” shops that sell cold drinks and pizza. There were all kinds of pizza. One of my favorites had thinly sliced potatoes and cheese on the top. You can spend 10 percent of what you would spend in a restaurant having lunch in a shop like this.
We met a young man from Russia in such a shop. He was eager for conversation, but did not know any English. However, he did speak Indian, and the shopkeeper was Indian, so we had the good fortune of having a translator. The Russian said he was on holiday, as he had broken up with his girlfriend and was heartbroken. As he told us his tale, more and more people in the shop joined in the conversation until everyone was involved. We took turns buying each other beers until we were pleasantly mellowed. A most excellent Soviet/American encounter on neutral ground!

Time Traveler

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You can time Travel back hundreds of years to the small town of Willingtown England to the late whatever during the Renaissance. YOU can be a Time Traveler!

For a small sum of coin you can enjoy an old English village complete with characters, and some are real characters, of medieval time.
This is the Northern California Renaissance Faire.
Maids washing rags (medieval clothing) and engaging in bawdy conversation greet you after entering the main gate.
People are clothed in period dress, complete with swords, helmets, and beer breath. I love this place.

One can attend the Faire in your own personal medieval garments, (most folks from San Francisco have a closet full) or purchase them onsite. I choose neither. Hawaiian shirt and shorts are my “day off uniform”. I may not blend in, but I will not be taken hostage by mistake either.
Many a shop and booth with food, drink, clothing, knick knacks, cool looking crystal balls, knives, daggers and “another thing to dust” are all for sale here.

Fairgoers all head for the mead and beer booth to quench ye thirst, and proceed to discuss anything that comes to mind about fifty decibels above normal conversation, thus making a medieval point of some sort. If you fill up on mead, a thick white like wine made from fermented honey and water, you may then choose “Ye Olde Bud Light” at said booth. You can down a few of these tasty beverages, and in no time soon find yourself in the town plaza secured to a yoke to the amusement of any and all who pass by.

The Romany Camp stage at Jazlas Coffehouse features the humor of “Broon”. This is a character not to be forgotten anytime soon. He is actually a stand up comedian who also does medieval tricks during their shows.

The shows at the faire are really funny, but do not volunteer or sit near the stage in case of sequestering. You would soon be the brunt of any and all humor in the show. I always have a better time laughing at another’s expense, not my own.

Broon will eat a stick on fire, not unlike any meal I have endured at my own home on any given day. The medieval crowd cheers for more, hoping against all hopes he will perish for their personal entertainment. Yay!

One of my favorite spectacles at the Fair is the Tournament of Champions. This would be the “joust”. The event involves breakaway lances for safety, but bones have been broken. I would not recommend doing this at home. The event starts with a couple of “Knights” talk smack for a while, then get on a very large horses, both man and steed in full armor, and on cue, charge at each other aiming a long lance with the goal of skewering his opponent like a shish kabob. The winner is last man standing. The crowd goes crazy. This is a must see, and arrive early as seating is limited.

Speaking of shish kabob, a massive area in the village is set-aside for food vendors. The variety of culinary delights boggles the mind. No Renaissance Faire worth it’s salt would be without Roasted Turkey Legs. The food “on the go” that says a lot about the consumer. Also, you have the chance to share a smoked Turkey leg with a wasp. Actually, there is a very good chance on this. I have traveled to this time for a few years, and the local wasps have too. They seem to only like the Turkey legs with attendees.
I have never had to fight over a BBQ roast beef sandwich or egg roll with a wasp.
It is well advised to bone up on medieval speak and/or broken Irish to sound local and blend in with the crowd.
Or drink 3 beers. You will fit in seamlessly.

Rosemary Potato Pizza Recipe

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On our last trip to Italy, my wife and I went on a quest for the perfect potato rosemary pizza. We had enjoyed this local cuisine at the many small bakeries in the towns and cities of Tuscany. After trying a few variations, we decided on procuring the recipe from a small shop in the town of Pisa, where pizza was invented and named after. Pisa Pie. As in “I would like a Pisa Pie to go, prego”.(please)
I engaged the cashier/chef with casual conversation and discovered to our good fortune that she was new on the job, and was referring to a vintage hand written recipe while making the potato pizza. As a distraction, I had my wife start a small fire in trash can in the far corner of the shop. Right on cue, the chef looked away and I snatched the recipe and ran for the door. My wife was detained for a while until they finally believed she had mistaken the trash can for a ashtray, after all, even the stray cats in Italy are avid smokers. After the initial shock that I had married an arsonist subsided, and with recipe in hand, I knew we had the means to replicate the savory pizza pie!
When we arrived back to our hotel, I used a complementary community computer and decoded the ancient Italian words only to discover it was not so ancient and was actually contemporary a shopping list, not a recipe.
Plan B.
After donning a simple, but effective disguise, I went back to the shop and asked for the recipe, which they were more than happy to tell, and here it is. Due to the fact that I do not have time to learn Italian, I have taken the liberty to translate the recipe into what I believe to be “The King’s English”, or some form of it.
They made theirs in large baking pans, which I consider too industrial for my taste, and as such, I fell back on the tried and true method of the 12 inch cast iron skillet.

Rosemary Potato Pizza Recipe

Ingredients

Pizza Dough*
1 Russet Potato
1 cup mozzarella cheese
1 tbsp Olive Oil
2 tbsp fresh chopped Rosemary
sprinkle of salt and pepper to taste

*Make your favorite pizza dough. Mine just happens to be the exact same recipe as the pre-made down at Trader Joe’s. So…..do I do ALL the work?
Again,I think not. Buy package and divide into two. You can make 2 skillet pizzas from one TJ package. If you want a scratch pizza dough recipe, my friend Maria sent me a great one. (at bottom of post)

Preheat oven to 500 degrees. Spread dough out in preheated 12 inch skillet. (heat skillet on top burner for one minute) Spread mozzarella cheese on dough. Peel, and thin slice potato,(about 1/8 inch slices) cover potato slices with cheese. Brush on olive oil, add a dash of salt and pepper, add chopped rosemary. Bake in oven for 18 minutes.(15 if you use Maria’s recipe, that will make great crust, but the potato will be Al dente. As such, maybe raise the rack?) Enjoy!

Word to the wise.
That skillet gets real hot, have a care when handling it!

PIZZA DOUGH
•    2 cups flour
•    1 (.25 ounce) package active dry yeast
•    1 cup warm water
•    2 tablespoons olive oil
•    2 teaspoons white sugar
•    1 teaspoon salt
Blend yeast in water and add  the sugar and olive oilPut 2 cups of flour in large glass or plastic bowl then add the wet ingredients and stir with a fork. ,  when the flour is wet then add your  1 tsp of salt.  (In Italy we say salt is added far away from the yeast)
When you have a ball you can put it out on your counter dusted with flour and begin to knead the dough until  is pliable and not sticky,  add flour if need be. (This should only take a few minutes) put back into bowl, cover with plastic wrap and put in your oven with just the oven light on.  .   Let raise until double the size.

For Schiacciata
Take sheet pan and oil the bottom with olive oil (using your hands)  Then  with your fingers poke the dough to make dents.  Once you have done this drizzle ½ to ¾ cups olive oil letting oil go into dents and sprinkle salt on top.   Bake in 450° oven until brown
Buon appetito!

Ciao, Maria

American Pie Recipe

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One of my family’s favorite recipes, handed down from generation to generation, is American Pie. This dessert pizza is not only a visual treat, but a gastronomical delight as well! The smell of freshly baked pizza wafting through your home will stir the appetites of the entire household.
Our forefathers first made this pizza just after the Revolutionary War, thus the circular shape of the stars in the original recipe of that time. We have traditionally baked this as an addition to our Fourth of July brunch, and it goes very well with a mimosa.
There were many early attempts to mass produce the American Pie pizza, but without the use of modern refrigeration, all were met with utter failure. The U.S. Postal Service has long discouraged mailing perishable items by mule, horseback or freight (with the exception of Christmas fruit cakes, which have a half life of 50,000 years).
With the advent of the Pony Express, the American Pie pizza could survive a two-day ride without too much dilapidation and loss or increase of flavor (increase in flavor is not good, far worse than loss).
Its popularity waned, and the recipe was almost lost to the ages. Now it is up to a hardy few culinary alchemists such as myself to carry on the American Pie tradition.
It’s as American as a mimosa!

American Pie Recipe
Ingredients
» Pizza dough (see note)
» 1 cup shredded mozzarella cheese
» 2 cups fresh strawberries
» 1 cup fresh blueberries
» 2-3 slices Monterey Jack cheese (or Swiss)
» 4 tablespoons sugar
» 1 mimosa
Instructions
Pre-heat oven to 500 degrees.
In a 12-inch skillet, spread pizza dough to edges. Add mozzarella cheese.
Slice strawberries in half, roll around in a little sugar for taste, and arrange as stripes on pizza.
Add blueberries to one quarter quadrant.
Cut Jack cheese into strips and a few small stars (or one big one) and set aside.
Bake in oven for 17 minutes. (15 if you use Maria’s recipe)
Remove from oven, remove from skillet, add “star(s)” on blueberry field. They will melt and keep basic shape.
As the strawberries may bleed a little (how patriotic!), slice more cheese into strips and add to top between strawberries, and let rest for at least four minutes.
Slice and serve with your mimosa!
Devour the American Pie immediately, as if it was the last pizza on Earth, for tomorrow it will look like that. Cooked strawberries do not appear as attractive on day two, and this pie is best eaten right out of the oven.
Note: Make your favorite pizza dough. Mine just happens to be the exact same recipe as the pre-made down at Trader Joe’s. So … do I do ALL the work?
I think not. Buy package and divide into two. You can make two skillet pizzas from one TJ’s package.

If you want a scratch pizza dough recipe, my friend Maria sent me a great one.

PIZZA DOUGH
•    2 cups flour
•    1 (.25 ounce) package active dry yeast
•    1 cup warm water
•    2 tablespoons olive oil
•    2 teaspoons white sugar
•    1 teaspoon salt
Blend yeast in water and add  the sugar and olive oil. Put 2 cups of flour in large glass or plastic bowl then add the wet ingredients and stir with a fork. ,  when the flour is wet then add your  1 tsp of salt.  (In Italy we say salt is added far away from the yeast)
When you have a ball you can put it out on your counter dusted with flour and begin to knead the dough until  is pliable and not sticky,  add flour if need be. (This should only take a few minutes) put back into bowl, cover with plastic wrap and put in your oven with just the oven light on.  .   Let raise until double the size.

For Schiacciata
Take sheet pan and oil the bottom with olive oil (using your hands)  Then  with your fingers poke the dough to make dents.  Once you have done this drizzle ½ to ¾ cups olive oil letting oil go into dents and sprinkle salt on top.   Bake in 450° oven until brown
Buon appetito!

Ciao,Maria